Best Adult SMS for Adult



Rating  SMS Length  7

Girl : "Forgive me father for I have sinned."

Priest : "What have you done my child?"

Girl : "I called a man a son of a bitch."

Priest : "Why did you call him a son of a
bitch?"

Girl : "Because he touched my hand."

Priest : "Like this?" (as he touches her hand)

Girl : "Yes father."

Priest : "That's no reason to call a man a son
of a bitch."

Girl : "Then he touched my breast."

Priest : "Like this?" (as he touched her breast)

Girl : "Yes father."

Priest : "That's no reason to call him a son of a
bitch."

Girl : "Then he took off my clothes, father."

Priest : "Like this?" (as he takes off her
clothes)

Girl : "Yes father."

Priest : "That's no reason to call him a son of a
bitch."

Girl : "Then he stuck his you know what into
my you know where."

Priest : "Like this?" (as he stuck his you know
what into her you know where)
Girl : "YES FATHER, YES FATHER, YES
FATHER!!!"

(after a few minutes)

Priest : "That's no reason to call him a son of a
bitch."

Girl : "But father,he had AIDS!"

Priest : "THAT SON OF A BITCH!!!"

Added on  13 Jul '11 Posted by  sms-top
Categories Adult SMS
Rating  SMS Length  1

Santa won an English quiz by writing the opposite word of:
Manchester United

Guess What he has written?.



Woman chest are Divided.. !

Added on  11 Jul '11 Posted by  Shrikul Shaikh
Categories Adult SMS,
Rating  SMS Length  2

Boy: So, sex at my place?
Girl: Yeah!
Boy: OK, but I sleep in a
bunk bed with my
younger brother and he
thinks we're making
sandwiches so this is the
code.
Cheese= Faster.
Tomato= Harder.

Girl: OK?

~Later~

Girl: CHEESE CHEESE
TOMATO CHEESE!

Brother: Stop making
sandwiches! You're getting
mayo all over my bed!

Added on  28 Aug '10 Posted by  Niraj Shergil
Categories Adult SMS
Rating  SMS Length  3

Boy goes to a chemist-
"Give me a condom. I'am going to my gf's house for dinner.

Then he says "Give me to more.
My gf's sis is a bomb 'n her mom is still hot."

During dinner, her Dad walks in.
Boy lowers his head 'n starts praying.

10 min 'n he is still praying, his head down.
All are surprised.
Girlfriend-" I never knew you are so religious"
Boy-" I never knew your DAD IS A CHEMIST!

Added on  26 Feb '11 Posted by  Lalit Parwani
Categories Adult SMS,
Rating  SMS Length  3

A guy had 2 choose a wife frm 3 grls.
He gave each sum money 2 tst em.
1st gt a makover to luk gud. Da man got imprssd.
2nd bought clths 4 da guy n tld him it's he who is prime for her. He lykd her also.
3rd invsted da money n made profit n gave it back. The guy liked her too.
And finally when the time came to choose---
The guy simply chose the girl with

The biggest boobs.
Men will always be MEN!!

Added on  10 Oct '11 Posted by  Nihil Sherma
Categories Adult SMS,
Rating  SMS Length  2

Woman: I had Sex wid only 4 boyz in my entire life & U had it wid 16 Girls, still, Everybody Calls me a SLUT
&
Cal u a REAL MAN,
A Winner?
Why?

Man: It's because,
when a Lock is Opened by many Keys,
it Becomes a BAD LOCK.
But when a Key Opens many Locks,
it becomes a MASTER KEY..;-);-) ;-)

Added on  10 Oct '11 Posted by  Tushar Gosai
Categories Adult SMS,
Rating  SMS Length  1

Hw fast cn u guess d wrds?
1.BOO_S
2._ _NDOM
3.F_ _ K
4.P_ N_S
5.PU_S_
6.S_X
Ans
1.BOOKS
2.RANDOM
3.FORK
4.PANTS
5.PULSE
6.SIX
U Got ALL 6 Wrong Didn't u?

Added on  7 Oct '11 Posted by  Vikas Kapur
Categories Adult SMS,
Rating  SMS Length  1

A boy & girl go 4 shoping.
Girl- (jokingly)- u hve nothing in ur head den y r u buying a helmet?

Boy- Yesterday u purchsed a bra, did i ask u anything..?

Added on  8 Sep '11 Posted by  Shivam Kumar
Categories Adult SMS,

Rating  SMS Length  2

On dinner, Son asks father: How many kinds of boobs r here?
DAD: 3 kinds,
In 20s like oranges, round n firm.
In 30-40 like pears, still nice but hanging a bit.
Aftr 50 like onions, u see them nd they make u cry.

Added on  18 Jun '11 Posted by  Suryanshu Thakur
Categories Adult SMS
Rating  SMS Length  1

Ladki Fish pot ko dekh kar boli:
Haye.. Ye machaliya itni sundar q hoti hai..??
Ladka: Q ki wo KAPDE nahi pehanti..!!

Added on  18 Jun '11 Posted by  Poorak Sharma
Categories Adult SMS
Rating  SMS Length  3

Before the examination, Scott asked the doctor if they ever laughed at their patients’ problems.
The Doctor replied ‘Of course I won’t laugh, I’m a professional. In over twenty years I’ve never laughed at a patient.
‘Okay then,’ Scott said, and proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the tiniest ‘whoo-ha’ the doctor had ever seen. It [...]

Added on  18 Jun '11 Posted by  Poorak Sharma
Categories Adult SMS
Rating  SMS Length  1

Man says to his wife: Let me take a picture of your
breasts, than I can always look at them. Wife: Let me
take a picture of you penis, I will have it enlarged

Added on  18 Jun '11 Posted by  Abhishek Chaudhri
Categories Adult SMS
Rating  SMS Length  1

Nipple Nipple dont be far,
can I press u in my car.
Up above the chest so high,
Always milky never dry.
Let me suck you,
Dont feel shy.

Added on  18 Jun '11 Posted by  Amrita Singh
Categories Adult SMS
Rating  SMS Length  1

A girl and boy were siting alone,

Boy started touching the girl

girl: don't touch me.
all thing only after marriage

boy: ok !
call me when u r maried !

Added on  17 Jun '11 Posted by  Ankit Gupta
Categories Adult SMS,
Rating  SMS Length  2

STRANGE BUT TRUE:-
In Ancient Times, In England Before People Havin Sex, They Needed SpeCiaL Permission 4m D King. Pple Who Got Permission Used To Hang A Playcard On Their Door Which Said:
Fornication
Under
Consent Of
King?
Thats F. U. C. K. For Short.
Now U Know Where That Word Came From..?

Added on  17 Jun '11 Posted by  Amrita Singh
Categories Adult SMS
Rating  SMS Length  1

In a party a lady wanted
to go to toilet so
she inquired with a sardar
papaji susu karne ki jagah dikhao,

sardarji replied u naughty
pehle tum dikhao.

Added on  17 Jun '11 Posted by  Abhishek Chaudhri
Categories Adult SMS
Rating  SMS Length  1

It’s the thing that satisfies
ur mind, body nd soul!
Do it on bed, on a sofa,
in the car or anywhere!
It’s called Prayer!
God bless ur naughty mind.

Added on  17 Jun '11 Posted by  Shrishti Das
Categories Adult SMS,
Rating  SMS Length  1

A short thing
its get longer as u hold it
nd pass between woman’s breast
nd enters into a small hole
What is it?

Answer: Cars seat belt…u dirty mind

Added on  16 Jun '11 Posted by  S. Mathur
Categories Adult SMS,
Rating  SMS Length  1

Boy:
“I like the s0ft thing behind ur BRA“

Girl:
“What“

Boy:
“Ur Heart“

Girl:
“I Love the Big thing btween ur 2 legs“

Boy:
“Wat“

Girl:
“Ur Bike“ ;->

Added on  15 Jun '11 Posted by  sms-top
Categories Adult SMS,
Rating  SMS Length  1

Sardar: Will you marry me?
Girl: Sorry I am a lesbian.
Sardar: What’s a lesbian?
Girl: I like to sleep with girls.
Sardar: Give me a hand… I am also lesbian.

Added on  14 Jun '11 Posted by  Shruti Mehta
Categories Adult SMS,
Rating  SMS Length  1

A pregnant lady went to an astrologer.
Astrologer: When u deliver a baby, baby‘s father will die.
Lady: Thank god! My husband is safe

Added on  14 Jun '11 Posted by  Shrishti Das
Categories Adult SMS
Rating  SMS Length  2

Geo News
Or ab GEO SEX
AaJ Open Market me bachi chodne ka tanasub ye raha:
18 saal ka seal pack maal 20 hazar, jab k 25 sy 30 ki range 15 hazar tk,
jab k international market me Goori ki choot marny k 200$ rhy,
Aaj din k ikhtitaam py shamim randi khana 22 bachiyan chudwa kr Sar-E-Fehrist raha
Champa [...]

Added on  14 Jun '11 Posted by  Aman Sahni
Categories Adult SMS
Rating  SMS Length  2

The most difficult golf course in the world is..
“Women Hole” any
style you play… as many shots you try..nd as much perfection you have..you
can never get your balls in…!!!

Added on  13 Jun '11 Posted by  Pallavi Sheth
Categories Adult SMS
Rating  SMS Length  2

Suhag Raat Ki Rat Ko Apni Wife Se Sex
Karne Ke Bad Pati Ne Apni Patni Se
Puchha Ki Tune Kya Mehsoos Kiya
Toh Patni Boli
5% Sharam,
5% Dard Or
90% Purane Din Yaad Aa Gaye

Added on  12 Jun '11 Posted by  Manan Malik
Categories Adult SMS

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